Chatti the Brave

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Photography
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- Travel
- Volak
Journal
Biblio
Contact

Reading Habits

"be easy.
take your time.
you are coming home.
to yourself."

-the becoming | wing by Nayyirah Waheed

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daily life
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literary memory

Took her to my childhood library today...well sort of...I took her to the same branch (Mark Twain) but it’s since moved across the street and got more glamorous. My childhood version was a bit cramped with lots of noise, a typewriter, homework help with my Mormon elders friends (my parents even had them over for dinner once), a stern Ms. Hoffman, and Saturday craft sessions with Ms. Pat. My dad donated his Khmer books to the small Khmer language section (no idea if any of it is still in the system) and it’s where I checked out Sweet Valley High and Sassy magazine. As nice as the library is now, I miss what used to be. I am still glad for libraries though and that “library” and “books” were one of her early words. #proudmom #readingismagical #ilovereading #literarymemories

Some of you have asked so I thought I’ll update: It’s been hard. Much harder than I thought it would be. I thought I’d prep myself years before, not because he was sick but because he was getting older and age doesn’t reverse. I thought there would be comfort in knowing that he didn’t kick and scream when he left this earth, that he went quietly but the days leading up to his death was painful. He told me so and I felt helpless. And this is still hard to hold.
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I want to retreat. That’s what I naturally do in times of pain. I take time to process internally and honestly, that’s the most healthy for me. I have no problem feeling all the feels and giving myself space it’s just with funeral arrangements, I haven’t been able to do all of that just yet. I’m with my little family now and will be here in California for another week making it a full three weeks since I’ve been away from home. I feel a little floaty, like I’m in some sort of dream. Like I’m sleepwalking.
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I go through waves. Right now memories are bittersweet and I try to push them away because any memory brings the realization that he is gone. I’m not sure how to tell you how much he meant to me so I keep quiet until I can properly do it right. I do need to say that I am okay. I think people feel frighten by those who express big emotions and I don’t want you to think that I think it’s the end of the world. If one thing my father taught me it was that we are born and we eventually die. What is important is the in between.

No brilliant words right now. My father passed away last night. While he is physically gone, he is imprinted in my heart forever. What a strong man he was to have risen above the things he had endured in his lifetime. What a lucky child I was for having been chosen to walk a part of his life with him. I love you, Dad.

Had a little quiet time in the early afternoon. I like these little snippets of rest. I had a great Lomi Lomi massage today (if you need a rec. I have just the person for you!). I came out of it not groggy but with a little hop in my step.
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The Dreamers was in my bag so I took it out to lunch and I’m captivated by this story of a town succumbing to slumber. I really liked her first book, The Age of Miracles. I think I’ll keep reading.
#bookstagram #weekendreading

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